Live Outside of the Box
Updated: Jun 5, 2022
Feel like you are running on a hamster wheel? It may be time for some changes! Lots of change is a theme in my life. I used to think of it as a bad thing, my constantly changing, then I started embracing it instead of looking at it as a fault and have never been happier.
I have many passions. I love change.
There are the people that are very happy with a daily repetitive routine and then there is us. We are the people who aren't big fans of the 9-5 and aren't 'typical.' Maybe you have gotten stuck in the box somehow, but are screaming to get out. Are you one of these people?
Trying to find the balance of being a mom and being the 'other parts' of you?!
If so, it is time to start embracing all parts and listening to the nudges instead of listening to the 'should's.
Stop listening to what you are supposed to be doing
Stop listening to how you are supposed to act .
Stop listening to how you are supposed to dress.
Stop listening to what you were told you were supposed to do career wise or feeling like you have to stick with it because that is who you were 20 years ago.
Start following those nudges to try the things you always wanted to or newly have desire for.
Start buying those clothes that you think you can't pull off but love.
Start taking classes and learning whatever you want. You don't need a reason to learn Italian (but hey...those dark and handsome Italians are some good motivation!)
Be ok with starting and stopping whatever the hell you want to (just give plenty of notice if others are involved).
Be ok with people not understanding you.
Be ok with quitting. This one gets its own little section because there is a lot around this. There is a difference between quitting and giving up due to fear of rejection, etc...that is another blog. I have quit a lot of things. But I have only FOUND the things I love by quitting the things I don't (including 'quitting' many men to finally find my prince!). Jokes aside, I am not against quitting and never view it as failure. I view it as trying something out to get closer to the best version of myself and the happiest me- who, in turn, is a better mom, wife and person in general. Win-win, peeps!
We grow constantly and therefore may develop new interests or goals. We are taught to stick things out, and I do value that to an extent. When I commit to doing something: a favor, plans, attending a wedding, substitute teaching, I will show up 1000%. Ironically I am hard core at committing and doing what I say I am going to do.
But if a pattern comes and my body/mind/soul is sayin', "Ehhhh this ain't it, C!" I will absolutely trust that instinct and choose joy over misery. This could be something I am doing in my own business, a hobby, or that top I bought only 6 months ago but doesn't fire me up like it did when I got it. Off to the donate bin!
Same goes for people (not the donate bin part, but that could be fun!). This may sound cold written out in a blog, but trust me, there is heartache that comes along with letting people go. But I do quit people who do not treat me well. I did not always. And let me tell you, it feels so good to not have to walk on eggshells around anyone. Not a romantic partner, not a family member, not a friend. I choose joy and peace over and over again in all aspects of life. Hell yea, I am a quitter! But I am also a doer. Which leads us to...
Be ok with doing things your way.
An old friend told me to "Pick one hobby"- that "I wasn't a kid anymore". Let's ask ourselves this...why do we have to stop playing or learning? or dancing? If you know me, you know I dance every.single.day. to start my day off. I am hoping some of you have not stopped the playfulness of life, but I see many people who think adulting means being bored and just checking off lists and going through the motions.
Stop prioritizing checklists instead of prioritizing happiness and love. And those things we have to do...well...make them fun however you can.
How do YOU live fiercely your own way? And if you don't, it is time to start! Life isn't getting any longer! Go sign up for that dance class, go tell that hellish boss you quit (I do highly recommend getting another job first!), go take that trip, volunteer, make weekly date nights, start being more present with your kids, hire a cleaning service, dance in the driveway while eating marshmallows and give zero effs what anyone things of any of it. Your true tribe loves you for YOU.
At the end of this life, what will matter is the LOVE AND JOY you felt and shared with the world...not that you fit into a box you never belonged in anyway.
If you need some help on this journey of balancing it all, email me at email@example.com to chat!
Be Fiercely You,